Just got back from the dermatologist...suicidal frustration, help please, everyone!

[DatJellyfish]

First off, I don't need everyone tell me to get help about the suicidal thing. It's not an immediate concern, just something that I can see this all developing into down the line. If you really care, then please try to give me some advice, some help.

I just got back from the dermatologist, I go because I've got a bit of acne...it's not overwhelming, but I'm pretty uncomfortable with it.

I've had issues with flushing, BIG TIME, since mid high school. I'm now 20 years old, and I go through it with everything. Sex, alcohol, certain foods, anxiety, the sun, the heat, EVERYTHING. I actually go through periods of times when it's worse than others, if I recall correctly...Only lately has it started to become an issue again.

I know this isn't strictly a problem with my skin itself at ALL, when I wake up in the morning, EVERY morning, my face is the same color as my arms, just a tad tan. And then any of those other things happen, and I can get so beet red in a way that lasts for hours at times. And it looks SO ridiculously unnatural, ESPECIALLY after sex. Milky white chest/stomach, brown arms, lighter brown legs, and a f*cking beet red face. I can't deal with this sh*t any more, it's a perpetual cycle and increases my anxiety.

My girlfriend is a BEAUTIFUL Asian with perfect caramel skin, but due to some circumstances, I haven't seen her in a while. The last time she was with me I wasn't dealing with this, she doesn't even KNOW about my rosacea other than that I used to get pink/red at TIMES. Lately, it's been freaking perpetual. And honestly, I'm almost sure that if she got back and saw this, I'd be on thin ice. Don't tell me not to be with someone so 'shallow,' attraction is part of relationships, and what I have is NOT attractive in the slightest. The discrepancy between this perfect, caramel skin and this beet red face standing in the mirror is jolting.

It's completely a blood flow related issue. To make matters worse, I've taken on a career that for months at a time may require me to be in the glaring Texas heat from 7 in the morning to 3 30 or 5 30 in the afternoon. I apply as much sunscreen as I possibly can, but I don't know if it's enough...the plant I work at won't allow me to wear any kind of hat that provides extensive coverage. And honestly, THIS may be why it's getting worse. For the first time in my life, at 20 years old, I'm able to see my blood vessels through my nose and at the very tippy top of my cheeks.

So I go into the dermatologist today, looking, hoping, praying for answers or results, promises, ANYTHING. She ignored EVERYTHING I had to say. She wasn't paying attention to me, instead, she just incessantly stayed on the topic of acne and blew off the rosacea thing altogether, though she did admit I had it. She basically said I was screwed. She said that I'm stuck like this unless I get IPL and that it's just going to get worse with every split second of sun I take it. She said my skin will just keep getting thinner and that it will never heal, even with periods of times without any sun. I'm not kidding you. I walked out of there crushed.

For one, I know for DAMN sure it's not even a skin problem...I wake up in the mornings and everything looks great. If I could just get this blood flow under control, everything would be PERFECT...I think...but I'm unsure about my sun exposure, or if anyone here is in a similar situation...

Anyways, she prescribed Metrocream, which I honestly know will have 0 impact, but I'll still try it. Told me to keep the rest of my regimen going, but that this was just going to get worse and worse all my life. She didn't even sound sorry or anything, just said it in such a "matter of fact" way. I can't afford any kind of IPL right now, I'm about to move in with my girlfriend. If I don't move in with her now, I'll lose her. If I keep getting worse and worse with rosacea, I'll lose her. And it's not just losing HER that's going to make me suicidal. I've already got some issues on those ends, things I'm trying to take care of. But I see rosacea taking people down a horrible social path, and that's just something I can't bear.

Whenever I can afford IPL in a couple of years, I'm DEFINITELY going to look into that...I'm also looking into a number of meds such as antihistamines or blood pressure reducers that might take care of the blushing/flushing altogether...and looking at melanotan. Maybe all of that together will get me where I need to be? Even if I'm enduring some hot summers out in the Texas heat (with sunscreen, mind you, though I can't apply every 30 mins or anything...more like every 2 hours. Also, I'm not ALWAYS out in the sun. It can range all over the place, 2 months in the sun, 8 months in air conditioning, or 2 years in the sun and 2 months in air condition...I just don't know where this job could take me, but it's definitely not perpetual...even the outside jobs you get to stay in the shade a lot of the times.)

Just...advice, please. Hope...anything. About the flushing itself, don't comment on my work or girlfriend, please. And thank you, very much...

[Ghost]

Can I comment on your food?

When I stopped consuming BREAD, Pasta, muffins... all that grain stuff (corn cakes, pancakes, oatmeal, corn chips), especially WHEAT, my flushing just... stopped. It only took a few weeks. This doesn't mean you can sub potato chips, of course!

Dump the super-processed stuff. Try paleo for a month.

G

[DatJellyfish]

Can I comment on your food?

When I stopped consuming BREAD, Pasta, muffins... all that grain stuff (corn cakes, pancakes, oatmeal, corn chips), especially WHEAT, my flushing just... stopped. It only took a few weeks. This doesn't mean you can sub potato chips, of course!

Dump the super-processed stuff. Try paleo for a month.

G

................wow. Just....wow. I'm not saying this is my cure all or that I'm going to be all good after this, but....I've been eating oatmeal for breakfast EVER since this started again. A nice sized helping of oatmeal. I'm not really sure what all to avoid...but I gotta stop the oatmeal for breakfast. Thank you so much!

[Ghost]

Oatmeal is supposed to be so healthy. But even before I knew about the dangers of grains I knew there was something up with oatmeal, for example, or bagels. ... I'd eat this wonderful full stuff for breaky and then *crash* not long afterwards. I'd go through the morning, sometimes most of the day, feeling half-baked.

It was the blood sugar spike (this is only a piece of how it does what it does to your skin, though).

Someone on this group or another R group mentioned having read that "rosacea is diabetes of the skin". That really caught my attention, it made so much sense.

As you know, there's a lot of literature out there regarding wheat, other grains, sugars and how they're even worse than we thought.

I hope this works for you. give it a whirl -- that's what I did. And I ended up saved. My skin was really bad, and for a very long time, too. I'd like to live my life over again and see how it would have worked out had I looked normal.

Good luck.

G

P.S. my blood pressure also plummeted to a super healthy 110/70 and thereabouts with this diet. Previously, I had "idiopathic" high blood pressure and was threatened with drugs. Nothing like fear of a lifetime of drugs to raise your BP in the doc's office!

[DatJellyfish]

Oatmeal is supposed to be so healthy. But even before I knew about the dangers of grains I knew there was something up with oatmeal, for example, or bagels. ... I'd eat this wonderful full stuff for breaky and then *crash* not long afterwards. I'd go through the morning, sometimes most of the day, feeling half-baked.

It was the blood sugar spike (this is only a piece of how it does what it does to your skin, though).

Someone on this group or another R group mentioned having read that "rosacea is diabetes of the skin". That really caught my attention, it made so much sense.

As you know, there's a lot of literature out there regarding wheat, other grains, sugars and how they're even worse than we thought.

I hope this works for you. give it a whirl -- that's what I did. And I ended up saved. My skin was really bad, and for a very long time, too. I'd like to live my life over again and see how it would have worked out had I looked normal.

Good luck.

G

P.S. my blood pressure also plummeted to a super healthy 110/70 and thereabouts with this diet. Previously, I had "idiopathic" high blood pressure and was threatened with drugs. Nothing like fear of a lifetime of drugs to raise your BP in the doc's office!

I hate to ask, you've helped a lot already, but do you think you can give me some info on the diet you currently have? I have like...0 ideas for what to do for breakfast/lunch/dinner now, honestly lol. If it's not oatmeal, it's poptarts or cereal for me. Or eggs, apparently you're supposed to stay away from that too >.>

Also, anyone else who can post on vasoconstrictors or ANYTHING...please. I just need this out of my life.

[Ghost]

You can get soy protein shakes. There are also rice and pea protein shakes, too.

Eggs might be OK, if you're not allergic to them.

Wild salmon and avocado is a nice breakfast combo.

Lots of people have dinner left overs for breakfast. I can't seem to do this, no matter HOW much dinner I make, my DH eats it all up!

There are some pretty good breakfast sausages you can have.

You can be British and have kippers, baked beans, stewed tomatoes and sauteed mushrooms. I know many say not to have beans, since they can present their own issues to many people, same as tomatoes. But rotating through the foods assures you don't have too much of anything.

Look up paleo menus or even Atkins menus.

For now, just to see if this is going to do it for you, just drop the flour and sugar and see how it goes. You can refine later.

Don't forget that you can use topicals. My favorites are borax+hydrogen peroxide+tea tree oil, and ivermectin. If you can get the ivermectin, go for that. Just google. Get the bovine injectable in the black box and use it as a topical just before you go to bed.

For more information read what I have in "about me" (hit over on the left where it says ghost in a color), and go to earthclinic.com and look up rosacea cures/borax cures/hydrogen peroxide cures.

G

[antwantsclear]

I completely agree with Ghost that excluding bread and other grains, and often dairy too, can make a significant impact on flushing. I really hope you can amend your diet to help you.

I would also say though in the immediate instance you might want to try clonidine as well (an alpha bocker medicine which helps blood flow through the veins easier). If this doesn't work well you can combine it with mirtazapine (an anti-depressant but prescribed off label for rosacea because it helps flushing). If you combine these medicines with the dietary changes Ghost suggests, including excluding spicy foods from your diet, you will almost certainly find your flushing becomes more bearable.

There are many other medicines and effective cleansing regimes that can also help. But making the changes suggested above is likely to make life a little easier. Hot showers in particular can make rosacea flushing much worse. They dry the skin a lot. Try to keep the shower head off your face.

[Melissa W]

The dietary changes are a good place to start for sure and in the meantime I think it is critical for you to really protect your face from the sun as much as possible given that you are out there in the heat of the day when the sun is at its strongest. Could you get a doctor's note explaining to your boss why you must wear a wide brimmed hat? If this is not possible-for you to wear a hat with a wide brim due to safety concerns at work- I urge you to reconsider your job. You are young enough where I hope this is possible because the sun has detrimental effects that are all encompassing and no matter how clean your diet and lifestyle is you must protect yourself from the harmful UV rays.

Best of luck!
Melissa

[arb161]

according to the Americans with Disability act an employer must provide a "reasonable accommodation" to employees with a disability. The definition of disability is very broad. For instance it includes "episodic impairments" like asthma. I once had to move a person off a job because there was too much dust in the room and he had allergies. So, a note from your doctor about your disease and the need for you to wear a hat should be enough. Also, if it would not cause "undue hardship" to the company, they might also accommodate you by keeping you inside. Besides the sun, I think that being out in the Texas heat is not helping either. I know that times are really hard in terms of jobs, but as Melissa advised, it would benefit you to find an inside job.
I was a severe flusher. I've improved with laser treatments. But I have found that food, with some exceptions (alcohol, spicey, shellfish, sometimes coffee) made absolutely no difference in either improving or making my condition worse. In my opinion, if something you eat causes you to flush, then don't eat it. You want to stay away from triggers as much as possible. For 99.9% of us alcohol is always out period. Eating healthy is good and do it whenever possible
Your doctor is a jerk. Some of these people have no damned empathy for the suffering of others. I had a doc who told me I was laser resistant and would always be homebound. It made me so incredibly depressed. I like to say that I wasn't quite suicidal, but felt that if a bus hit me it would be ok. But he was full of crap. If I gave into those feelings I wouldn't be having as much fun as I now do with my new granddaughter. If you possibly can, find another doctor. But there are a lot of idiots like her out there so it may take a few tries. Beta blockers like clonidine, and antibiotics (which make you more sun sensitive) also help. Also, if you have insurance check to see if they will cover laser treatments a lot of them are getting better about that.
Unfortunately there is no quick fix for this. You have to persevere. I'm so sorry that you're in this hell right now but don't let one doctor write off your entire future
Arlene

[DukeCity]

I think every one of us here has felt EXACTLY like you, I know that I have - I found what works for me, everyone is different but don't ever give up. Remember that there are several very very promising prescription topicals in Phase 2 and Phase 3 Clinical Trials and Sansrosa has already completed Phase 3, there is help on the way for you, stay positive. Look on the bright side, you won't have to suffer for decades of rosacea like a lot of us here have, when an RX topical is released, hopefully in the next 2 years, it will change your life.. Best of luck.